Beauty-Make your Skin Glow

Make your skin glow

A glowing skin is not only a true mark of beauty but of a healthy body. The skin is like an indicator for a healthy body. It is therefore a worthy cause to make your skin glow at all times. You can be on a budget and still have a glowing skin, the act of making your skin glow doesn’t have to be expensive. Two things are pertinent to note when you want to make your skin glow.

1. The  cleanliness of the skin.

2. The state of the body.

The Cleanliness of the skin:

 A dirty skin cannot glow naturally. In order to make your skin glow, it has to be clean, rid of dead skin cells, excess oil secretions and other impurities. As we grow older, the skin’s ability to do this cleaning on it’s own becomes less and we start to have blemishes( mostly made out of dead skin cells) and an uneven complexion. The forehead and parts of the face away from the centre of the face( the nose) starts having several uneven shade differences from the inner parts of the face. To make your skin glow, you have to get rid of these dead skin cells, excess oil secretions and impurities by exfoliation.

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Exfoilating with natural products are the best ways to clean your skin in order to make it glow. Heavy dependence on facial cleansing creams, cleansers and exfoliating creams rids your skin of all it’s self exfoliating ability and creates a permanent dependence of the skin on such products. In other cases changing products or mixing products might actually break down more skin cells , leaving the skin looking saggy and scaly without the use of these products. To exfoliate your skin naturally, scrub your face in the morning with the inner parts of a banana peel and wash off with water at room temperature after 10-15 minutes. You can kick it up a notch by using a paste made out of banana, apple, Vitamin E , egg whites and honey blended together and rubbed on the face like a mask for inward of 15 minutes and then rinse. After which you can then moisturize with a an Ultra Moisturizing Face Cream.. Stay off anti-aging creams as they would eventually age the shit out of you.

RELATED POST: WHITEN YOUR TEETH

The state of the body:

You  can also take a detox bath for about 40 minutes. You would need to have a bath tub or at least a very large container for this anyway. Fill the bathtub with preferably chlorine free water , pour a cup of Epsom Salt, a cup ofBaking Soda , some drops of an Aromatherapy Essential Oil and Organic Ginger Powder and swish the contents together in the bath tub, you may also add little sea salt and other essential oils. Soak your body in it for 40 minutes without letting your hair come in contact with the water , to get rid of toxins in the body that affects the appearance of the skin. Rinse your body afterwards using a loofah or sponge to scrub the skin. This however is not advisable for diabetics because of the Epsom salt.

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Nutrition is also very important in order to make your skin glow. Laying off alcohol, tobacco, and junk foods would help preserve the skin. Adding fruits and vegetables to your daily meals would also help make the skin glow. Vitamin supplements especially vitamin A and E should be used daily in healthy doses. You can also use a skin cocktail to make your skin glow. The cocktail consists of  carrots (3 pieces), spinach(30 g), 8 cherry tomatoes , kiwi, milk ( about 50 ml) all blended together and taken at once every morning. After few days results would be evident. 

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Get Rich Get Married.

Get Rich, Get Married.

Have you ever thought of having $65 Million Dollars to your name without being Oprah, Owning a multimillion dollar business or being an actor, athlete or Business tycoon. The answer is simple, get married. Get married not, to the love of your life with a couple thousands in savings and a bucket load of untapped potentials, not to some dumb pro-baller hoping to get a huge divorce settlement when he becomes randy. No! Get married to  Cecil Chao Sze-tsung .

Cecil ‘s father, a Hong Kong property business tycoon has issued a bounty of about $65 million dollars for any Man who would marry his daughter,  the only problem here is that Cecil doesn’t like men, she is a Lesbian. 

Apart from being a lesbian, Cecil also has a wife who she married in Paris in 2012 where the  anti-homosexual laws are not  stringent. Her father on the other hand, not okay with the idea of his lovely daughter being a lesbian has put his money where his mouth is, in trying to get his girl to get married to  someone with a  penis.  

He said “I do not mind whether [the man who marries Gigi] is rich or poor. The important thing is that he is generous and kindhearted. Gigi is a very good woman with both talents and looks. She is devoted to her parents, is generous and does volunteer work.”

Cecil has simply laughed it off and said it was nice that her father really cared about her and was loving to her, and it was really sweet of him to do that. She went on to say that the reason her father was doing this was because he feared the way the public would view her. It is nothing strange for  a woman’s family to pay some kind of token for a man, like a he-goat in the animal farm. This practice though illegal now, is still very much practiced in places like India. What is however surprising is the offer to  pay $65 million dollars just to get your daughter a gold digger. And as expected Cecil had receives about 1500 emails daily all professing love and depicting ways in which they could convert a lesbian.

RELATED POST: 8 LADIES TO NEVER MARRY

Getting  married to Cecil would not be a problem if you have a strategy and work towards it. The first thing is that you have to even know her or at least run within her circles( not google+ circles), to determine what she likes, how to woo her  and how to eventually cash in on all that money amidst accusations of being a gold digger by the whole world. She would have to ensure a break up with her present spouse  Sean Yeoug and then make her profess her love for you. You would probably need help from Richard L A Ruina, the author of The Natural: How to Effortlessly Attract the Women You Want  in accomplishing this task. The chances of success however are  very slim as Cecil is 34 years and technically not a rich airhead. Like Adele said, “ you can have my number , but you would never have my heart “ or in this case my vagina and my father’s $65 million dollars , but good things happen to people who are patient enough to wait.

While you are reading this , if you are considering giving it a shot or letting  yourself get lost in the thoughts of how to woo Cecil, you are most likely in a state of  severe dumbness and you probably have never read the post wrong reasons to get married.

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Foods that make you dumb.

Foods that make you dumb.

Dumbness is ubiquitous. Most people would agree that most countries have government officials, celebrities and public speakers who are in a perpetual state of dumbness. In this present day and time, while technological development has greatly increased and the world seems to be advancing in leaps and bounds in science, it would be convenient to say that dumbness is also on the increase. The advancements are just due to a very little fraction of people on earth who have found a way to escape the tsunami of dumbness ravaging the world , either by genetics , study, motivation  or accidents to the cerebrum. The food industry has helped too, producing all sorts of foods that make you dumb. One of the most common ways to ascertain your state of dumbness is to take an IQ test. The results would be alarming if taken correctly and if the tests were created by people who are not dumb. If you are not genetically disposed to escape dumbness, you can still give it a shot by avoiding some of these foods that make you dumb. On a second note, the percentage of your daily food intake that these foods make is inversely proportional to your dumbness. If you don’t understand the last statement, yes , you are dumb. Here are foods that make you dumb.

1. Alcohol: 

You are now in a perfect brain condition to
change the world! Moron.

If you  immediately went into defense mood on reading the first item with arguments like “ alcohol isn't even a food item”, “ alcohol has been known to improve your sex drive” or “ alcohol in moderation is good for the heart”, you are in a chronic state of dumbness. There is a reason why people who are in distress or having a bad day run to alcohol, it is to  disrupt their ability to process emotions by deadening their brain cells. It creates brain fog or in other words mental confusion. That is when you have had a little too much to drink, you don’t remember the events that follow because your brain has come to a screeching halt and it would just take a couple more halts for  it’s gaskets to burn off and you become a moron.

RELATED POST: FOODS THAT MAKE YOU HORNY.

2. Junk Food: 

Junk foods are addictive. Addiction is not a thing of the mind, it has to directly do with the brain. According to the university of montreal which tends to have a lower concentration of dumb people , junk foods like fries, hamburger trigger some symptoms similar to withdrawal symptoms when you stop consuming them. They directly impart the production of dopamine. Fact is you are just a few fries away from not remembering your mother’s middle name or worst still Alzheimer’s disease.

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3. Salt: 

This doesn't look like salt. Dumb blogger

Salt is one of the foods that make you dumb. It affects your cognitive function, apart from affecting your blood pressure and heart. Making you dumb is the least effect of too much salt however, stroke, cardiovascular disease and even stomach cancer are more serious effects. Putting raw salt on your food is worse than having it cooked with the food. Ditch the salt sprinkler and  feel your intelligence rise. This is not to say you should start eating saltless food, you are not 90 and toothless, or maybe you are in dumb years.

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4. Trans fats and Artificial sweeteners: 

All foods containing trans fats and artificial sweeteners are robbing you of your brain power. They are making you dumb. They affect your brain response. All of a sudden, you begin to think it’s cool to watch child porn, have kids by a bunch of sluts and refuse to pay child support, spending two hours a day playing video games while snacking on foods with trans fats and artificial sweeteners, the same foods that made you dumb in the first place. Artificial sweeteners cannot be totally avoided. They are present in your toothpaste, mouth wash, chewable vitamins and cough syrups.

5. Nicotine: 

Nicotine affects the function of neurotransmitters by tightening the capillaries, affecting brain function. It works in such a way that once you have it in your blood stream, you have sustained attention and calmness and then when it reduces, you realize the brain can no longer function and hence the need to take it again without realizing that nicotine is the culprit itself that caused the brain fog. These foods make you dumb but withdrawing from them would not automatically make you Albert Einstein. There is still so much work to do about that. Never Underestimate Your Dumbness

RELATED POST: THE STATE OF DUMBNESS

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Burnt Bridges: The Oldest Divorce Ever

Burnt bridges: The oldest divorce ever.

The story of Antonio C and Rosa C puts a new meaning to “ what goes around comes around”. There is nothing covered that would not be discovered. The question is when would it be discovered? Is it immediately or ten years after or in this case 60 years after, when you are old and grey and can hardly bear the weight of the consequence. Just like porn, adultery is a burnt bridge. That is what Rosa C came to find out at the tail end of her life.

Antonio C and Rosa C have been married for upward of 70 years. Antonio is 99 years old and his wife is 96 (as at 2011). They met in the 1930s where everything was in black and white. No iphones, sexting or words like fag, gangbang, N-word, sleepovers or one night stands were used. It was the time of the innocent except for the wars that threatened to destroy the world.

Antonio C was a Military officer back then, participating in the war. He was in Naples in Italy and they had hit it off immediately and eventually married in  the 1930s. Ten years into the marriage, the nights became too cold to bear for Rosa C.  She then yielded to  temptation, the same way a 12 year old boy today yields to peer pressure. She had an affair.  While in the extramarital affair, she did what lovers do in 1940, write letters to each other. She wrote love notes to her boyfriend and he wrote back.We are guessing, she enjoyed it while it lasted.

RELATED POST: WHY CHEATERS CHEAT

Rosa C was an expert, she was able to juggle being a wife, a girlfriend, a seamstress(most likely) and a mother of five children. The five children who would eventually produce a dozen grandchildren and one great grand child for Rosa and Antonio were all in the dark about their mother’s extracurricular activities. She had every reason to engage in the extramarital affairs, their marriage was a turbulent one and she never had the chance to read an article titled husbands that should hit the road. 

10 years before now, Antonio now 89, left their matrimonial home to live with one of his sons to finally get away from his turbulent 50 year marriage, only to return when he realized his son’s house is not an old peoples’ home and there are no marriage counseling programs for couples who have been married for fifty years. The only advice people gave him was “ hang in there, asshole!”. So they figured out they were kind of stuck in this relationship until now.

One fateful day just before Christmas  Antonio was searching a chest of drawers, probably for his marriage contract to try and see clauses in it, that could ensure he spent the rest of his life in piece and there it was, the old dusty 60 year old love letters  written to someone who was probably dead by now( because we are guessing home wreckers don’t live long). There was no mistaking it, this love letters were written at a time he was in his prime and could go all the 9 yards. He immediately accused his wife of infidelity with the dusty old proof, from a 60 year old chest of drawers . 

RELATED POST: HOW TO HANDLE INFIDELITY AND ADULTERY IN MARRIAGE.

Rosa C read  the words written with dip pen on an ancient hardwood paper and remained her flame. She then went on to confess and tell him the whole truth and begged her husband to stay.

Antonio refused and they went on with the divorce. Making them the oldest divorcees ever.  As at the time of writing this post, we are guessing they are both six feet under, or maybe they are alive experiencing the pain, shame and heartbreak experienced in the few years after a painful divorce. On another note,  a DNA test might not be out of place cause we are guessing the other man may have been his best friend.

Read: Cheating Wife: My Adultery, My Emotional Affairs, My Wrong Christian Romances

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Foods That Make You Horny.

Foods that make you horny.

Sex is a beautiful thing, provided no one dies afterwards, #safe sex.The urge for sex however , otherwise known as being horny is not all that beautiful as it   (depending on one’s libido) can be overpowering, controlling and sometimes frustrating especially when there is no way of relieving such  sexual urges except to waste precious time on masturbation and Porn. Even if you have a willing participant, spending the rest of your life having sex would put you on the same class as the bonobos.

Animals in the wild who don’t have to go to school, look for a job, pay bills , eliminate male genital odor or whiten their teeth don’t even have sex all the time. Mating leaves them vulnerable to predators, and doing it 'just for pleasure' wastes valuable time which would have been otherwise used to hunt, or  watch the sun set.
 It is safest to be horny when you can be satisfied and have so much time in between. There are some foods that make you horny all the time ,turning you into a raging bull  waiting for a prey. Worse still, is being part of a society that doesn’t put any allowance for being horny. Just ask the unmarried men in Asia who have to wait to be wooed by a prospective bride and have no avenue to discharge their batteries even when it is being constantly charged by these foods, the media and their sick genes. Here are foods that make you horny.

1. Banana:

There is a reason why monkeys, chimpanzees and bonobos are always horny and a chimp is more likely to rape you than to kill you. Bananas!. A substance called bromelain is responsible for this. Bromelain has libido boosting properties and banana also contains potassium which aids muscle strength and super-intense  orgasmic contractions. You might also be blown by Nang Tani, some kind of female Thai ghost that haunts banana tress. The effect of bananas however do not even come close to the effect  of devouring a tiger’s penis prepared in traditional Chinese cuisine for  male stamina and animalistic bed skills. Are you still wondering why the Chinese are a billion and over?.

RELATED POST: FOODS THAT HELP LOSE WEIGHT

2. Water Melon:

There is also a reason why the insides of a watermelon is pink and wet. Watermelon is one of the foods that make you horny. It contains phytonutient citrulline boosting the amount of nitric oxide in the body which mimics the effect of sildenafil (Viagra), relaxing blood vessels and speeding up circulation, soon you would  be all pinky and wet and ready to go. For a prefect boost , you are better off eating leaf cutter ants given to newly weds in ancient south America.

3. Avocados:

Avocados and asparagus also ranks among foods that make you horny, they boost hormones like testosterone in men,  estrogen in women and progesterone which helps  vaginal lubrication, and makes you horny. Avocados not only help you lose weight , they also boost your sex drive, although not in the same way as the Philippines  Malunggay Herbal Tea does.

4. Garlic:

 Garlic inflames the passions. There is a reason why Tibetans monks are  forbidden from entering their monastery after eating garlic.( Reverend Fathers  should take a cue from this). Garlic aids blood flow and healthy circulation  from one part of your body to the parts that are needed for shagging. The devout Hindus in India don’t use garlic for food preparation during festivals while the others just eat it like it’s a snack and then have to deal with  constantly being horny and guess who bears the consequence. The  females , in just the same way Turtles are endangered in Florida because turtle eggs are believed to be the best aphrodisiacs by Mexicans.

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5. Oysters: 

Oysters is the king of aphrodisiac causing a huge spike in testosterone and estrogen in women due to the zinc properties in this foods. Oysters  is one of the major foods that make you horny. They come from the sea and everything in the sea including the sea itself  is horny.A tsunami is just the sea trying to rape land and everything on it, when it can no longer hold itself. Mixing a cobra’s blood with alcohol and downing it , done in Vietnam and china would literally put the sea in your veins. Oysters can be very tricky though, if not well cleaned as some of the substances it absorbs into it's body from the sea  can be toxic for your sex drive cancelling out the zinc properties which makes you horny.

RELATED POST: FOODS THAT KILL MALE GENITAL ODOR

6. Red wine:

Red Wine is good for your heart, Likewise  sex . Red wine contains resveratrol, which boasts blood flow and improves circulation, providing a suitable atmosphere for sex. The same way a Spanish fly juice does.

7. Coconut water

Young coconut Water, (not the processed one) would make you horny. This right here, apart from helping to regulate your appetite, make your skin glow and relieve you of toxins, would send your sex hormones running wild. This becomes noticeable after downing about 3 full ones. In some parts of the world , it is often referred to as the sex milk.

                             RELATED: FOODS THAT CAUSE ACNE

Other noteworthy foods that make you horny are chocolates, salmons and walnuts, fenugreek seeds, hot chillies, pomengranates, vanilla, Honey, pumpkin seeds, Olives and even figs. Laying off all these foods that make you horny would still not guaranty that you would still not be horny, because being horny is a natural thing and you may just have the sick horny genes that makes you horny all the time, that way you just have to live with yourself or make your erection( or stimulation) your direction.

                             FOODS THAT PREVENT YOU FROM BEING HORNY

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Beauty: Whiten your Teeth.

Beauty-Whiten your teeth.

A white teeth smile is always a charmer,  it can go a long way in getting you what you want. People tend to think that if a person especially a guy can pay so much attention to his teeth, then he would pay his partner the much needed attention. Problem is the only time teeth are naturally white is when they are milk teeth and they soon fall off like dominoes and then the permanent teeth come up, and this ones get stained like  white silk cloth. The teeth become more yellow or opaque and generally have a darker hue, usually after 20. Whitening your teeth then becomes a necessity. No matter how clean you are and even if your breath smells like lavender, brown teeth is always regarded as dirty, unkempt, unhygienic, gross and repulsive.  In the world of Beauty and all things beautiful, there are several ways  that you can use to whiten your teeth , each differing in cost, time taken to see changes and how long changes last. Starting with the low budget method in which you can whiten your teeth.

1. Become a teeth awareness freak: 

Brush out those greasy stains now

If you want to whiten your teeth cheaply, taking up a teeth awareness lifestyle would get you there. This involves brushing first thing when you wake up and last thing before you sleep, and then after every meal within the day. You would have to change your brush every 2 months and use hard to extra(smoker’s hard) toothbrush. You can also take it up a notch by using a straw every time you want to take a liquid such as wine, tea, cola, sport drinks and sauces to avoid them coming in contact with your teeth. Using the right toothpaste that aids the whiten of teeth is also noteworthy here. Toothpastes are meant to whiten your teeth, give you fresh breath( if you use them on your tongue), prevent tooth decay and diseases, give you stronger teeth( you are better off taking calcium for this) and protect you against enamel erosion, gum problems and cavities among other things. Some however have areas in which they beat out the others, Ultra Brite Advanced Whitening Fluoride Toothpaste for example, has advanced whitening as it’s major goal. If you are in America, you should look for toothpastes with  American Dental Association (ADA) Seal of Approval. Toothpastes with ingredients such as blue covarine or modified silicone abrasives  should be favoured above others to  whiten your teeth. Using an Ultrasonic Toothbrush would also speed up the teeth whitening process. All these costs under 10 bucks and within a month you should see changes and changes last as long as you live the lifestyle. Even though you would be a freak, you would be a whitened teeth freak.

RELATED POST: HOW TO BLEACH YOUR SKIN

2. Using Natural Materials:

This involves using natural materials for teeth whitening. You can whiten your teeth by scrubbing them vigorously twice a day with either banana peels, orange peels ,lemon peels or mashed strawberries. The best is banana peels. Scrub the inner white part against your teeth and then brush afterwards. Same with orange, lemon or strawberries.  Olive oils  can also be used to scrub the teeth with a cloth after brushing.

Who knew that the high maintenance chic in class
did this crap.

Another natural way of teeth whitening is by the use of chew sticks or chewing sticks made to be chewed a long time(30mins) and used to brush the teeth. These Tea Tree Original Chewing Sticks still very much popular in Africa used in a combination of vertical and horizontal strokes  on tooth surfaces removes plaque. The sticks have been praised much more for their antimicrobial properties and effects. The sticks are twigs made from stems of trees such as cinnamon, dog wood, Neem and tea tree. While results vary greatly, there should be a very noticeable difference between 2- 4 weeks of continuous daily use.

RELATED POST: FOODS THAT WHITEN YOUR TEETH

There is a reason why rural Africans have
white teeth

3. Using Chemicals:

The most commonly used chemicals for teeth whitening is a combination of Baking Soda and Hydrogen Peroxide After brushing your teeth everyday, damp your brush and put baking soda  and a little hydrogen peroxide  to make a paste on it, then re brush your teeth with the little paste. The hydrogen peroxide can be bought over the counter in a chemist.Apple Cidar Vinegar or any type of vinegar would help whiten the teeth, dripping  a cloth in vinegar and scrubbing the teeth would do the trick , you can also mix apple cider vinegar with your toothpaste.

RELATED POSTS: MAKE YOUR BUTT BIGGER | MAKE YOUR BOOBS BIGGER

4. Using Teeth whitening materials such as strips, trays, pens:

When using Teeth Whitening Trays you should use protective gloves, heat water to about 710C, then put in the whitening trays in the water for about 5 seconds. Put the tray in your mouth , closing  your lips tightly. Press tongue against the roof of the mouth and the back of the teeth. With a strong sucking action, suck out all the air and water, tightening lips against the front side of the teeth for at least 5 seconds.  After this open your mouth and press the whitening tray against the inside and outside of the teeth. After this , tray should be removed and rinsed with cold water. Trim the tray to the shape of the teeth. After brushing your teeth and loading the icing in the tray, place tray on teeth and leave for  not more than 90 minutes , after which tray should be washed and mouth brushed. Results can be seen within 2 hours.

Whitening Pens 3PK and Teeth Whitening Strips also work in much the same way as the tray to whiten  your teeth but results show in about  7 days and all this materials are quite affordable.

5. Teeth bleaching: 

You can whiten your teeth using personal Teeth Bleaching Kit . A DIY approach.Get the kit
and follow the instructions.

6. Dentist Magic.: 

 A visit to the dentist would give a quicker and longer lasting result to whiten your teeth. The only downfall of this is that most times the results are over the top, your smile immediately looks unnatural and fake from a mile away. Your teeth should not be  several shades whiter than the eyeballs. There should be a blend. At the dentist’s office, you would be able to bleach your teeth professionally using peroxide or better still do laser whitening.

If you don't go for anything, go for the gas!

If you think that you are going to have sparkly white teeth and continue smoking those cheap carcinogenic cigarette sticks and downing 100 cups of coffee per day. You are building your castles in the air.

 And finally everything in life has a little risk attached to it,this is as sure as a non-smiling smoking man.But most of these procedures have very little risk attached. Hurting yourself being the most common and these days you don't have to bleach your teeth to hurt yourself, you can simply step out of the shower still drenched on a marble floor. Now whiten your teeth!

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