ARE BEARDS COOL? SHOULD I GROW ONE

I love beards! I sure do
Are beards cool? Should I grow one.
Beards for men goes way back to the medieval times. It was either a sign of wealth, a sign of class or status, a religious obligation or was abolished to prevent vulnerability. In the 19th century president Lincoln made beards popular for Americans and today about 33% of American Males have facial hair while a whopping 55% of males worldwide have beards. Cool beards are more of a fashion statement, not for wealth, religious but a fashion statement.
Cool beards are the type that are trimmed, nurtured, cultured and maintained to make you look older, more respectable , powerful and of a higher status.
As cool as beards are, beards would however not make men more attractive to women. Women tend to feel intimidated by a bearded guy especially since 98% of men on the Forbes list don’t have beards but bad asses all come with beards. Most corporate organizations that offer mid-level careers to men are also against growing beards, so a lot of times, with a full nurtured cool beard, you are either working for a millennial tech giant, or your own company that manufactures dork whistles or you are just a cool classic state of art hippie.

One of these guys runs a tech startup, the other is a state of art hippie, #GoFigure

There is a #beardgang family on Instagram and Twitter that consists of young fashionista men, making fashion statements with their cool beards and breaking all kinds of preconceived notion about beards because real men have beards. One health benefit of growing beards is that beards help to filter out dust and pollen if you have allergies, meaning that your beards is basically a dust catcher and insect trap.

In religion, while the Moslem and Sikhs seem to  favour beards growing , Christians, Mormons and a couple other religion frown at it.

To grow a beard, you simply need to

1.    Stop shaving, if it grows naturally. If it doesn’t then you need to get  help either with a beard cream, a beard oil , a beard pill or the age long low budget grow your beard fast regimen that uses  methylated spirit and cotton wools to simply dab the jawlines in the mornings and evenings after shower. Though this seem to have no scientific basis, a lot of boys and men swear by it. This would however be more harm than good if you have a facial skin that is sensitive to the alcohol in the methylated spirit. Others swear by constantly shaving any little trace of facial hair on the face to stimulate the growth of better stronger, nicer looking beards. Although the shaving of beards to make it grow has often been regarded as a myth. It still works. Just like shaving the hair of babies to make a fuller one grow, the best grow your beards fast activity might be to lose the little scattered, horrible looking beards you have to make the cool beards grow in it’s place.

Beards have been known to grow faster when the male has abstained from sex for a long time. Just ask the  Arabs, all that pent up sex energy and testosterone has to go into something. 

Although contrary to popular opinion, beards have also been known to grow faster in the summer , than in any other season.
Testosterone, vitamins supplement and zinc has been known to encourage facial hair growth in men and this is contained in most “grow your beard fast” creams.

2.    Even after you grow your beards, then the nurturing needs to  takes place. Beards would never look  good in their natural uneven glory. They need to be constantly groomed, maintained, plucked, caressed and picked for that cool beard look on the #beardgang family.
To care for your beards you would need
1.     A beard grooming kit
A complete beard grooming kit would have the following materials
1.    A beard oil
2.    A beard balm
3.    A beard wash
4.    Beard Trimmer
5.    Beard comb
6.    A toiletry bag.
 With a beard grooming kit, a medium size mirror and a little time on your hands, you are fully equipped to shape out the beards of your dreams. For professional beard carving, you might need a barber with years of beard grooming experience (yes! you have to request for his resume) to help you out.

2.     A beard brush and comb
Depending on the size of your beards, an additional beard brush and comb might be required, as the ones that come with the beard grooming kit or beard management set as it is often called might not be enough to tame the seaweed growing out of your face. Just in case you were wondering, the longest beard ever was about 17.4 feet, that is the height of two LeBron James on top of each other while standing on their heels  and it literally killed the owner when he stepped on it.
3.    A beard conditioner and relaxer.
This might be necessary if you want to make your cool beards even cooler by making it a work of art. Beard conditioners and relaxers would help give you beards a perm and are basically just hair relaxers made for the facial hair. Can I use hair relaxers for my facial hair? Just try it first and thank me later. Although with a beard relaxer also comes the need for a beard wrap because you don’t want to be rubbing that greasy beard all over the pillow or your significant other.
Beards are cool, they’ve always been and if your face is not your best feature, try growing a beard across it, to cover a significant portion of it and then constantly rock some cool sunglasses like Rick Ross.

Whoo!

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SPERM SWALLOWING: TO SWALLOW OR NOT TO SWALLOW

SPERM SWALLOWING: TO SWALLOW OR NOT TO SWALLOW
Sperm in this particular context is actually supposed to be semen, the male ejaculate and is rightfully defined by Mike Cunt as the   ” white squiggly liquid which causes your life to be ruined when reaches womans egg” (sic). This is the most voted definition written in April 2003 on urban dictionary, making Mike cunt some kind of legend.
Semen has so many names, cum, nut, jizz, penis pudding, seed, spunk, splooge and baby maker, to name just a few. In recent times, women and gay men have constantly debated whether to cum swallow or not.
Knowing fully well that this article is not about to change your mind on what you have already determined to do or not to do, it is important at this junction, to use the words of Jesus, "What you are about to do, do quickly.” Or in more literal terms, “fuckin just go fucking swallow the fucking jizz”.

Cum swallowing was made popular by porn, it was not done by the ancient Egyptians while they were building the pyramids, as those motherfuckers clearly needed all the energy they could get. There is no record of swallowing semen by the ancient Greeks, although it is greatly suspected and suggested, maybe I’m just too fucking dumb to do proper research. Ten years ago , this article would even have been completely strange and perverse but time always makes things more perverse.
The question here is to swallow or not to swallow.
Swallowing cum can be for three reasons.
1.    As a fetish
2.    As a health benefit.  In this case, we would have to consider the pros and the cons of swallowing that jizz.
3.    As a cultural Ritual.

Swallowing Cum as a Fetish

If you or your partner has a fetish of swallowing cum or watching the other swallow cum, then why read an article about it. Just swallow it already. No one is going to discourage you from your fetish, you pervert. You only live once and what is life without some kind of fetish. No matter how bad you feel about yourself for swallowing cum, just remember swallowing cum can never put you on TLC’s my strange addiction . To be on that program, you have to do much more crazy stuff like hair eating, tissue paper eating or be a full on cannibal.

  The only plus side to that, is that you might be making some money pretending to eat human hair or smell people’s butts.  If swallowing cum is really your fetish, then get your partner a semen booster that would increase volume of the cum right up to over 300% of what he normally shoots.

Swallowing cum for it’s health benefits.

To swallow cum for it’s health benefits, we have to way the pros and the cons .

Health benefits of swallowing semen

Semen is a nutritious cocktail. It contains fructose, ascorbic acid, protein, calcium, chlorine, DNA, magnesium, Vitamin B12, Lactic Acid, Nitrogen, Vitamin C, citric acid, Blood group antiegnes and s, zinc and cholesterol.

If semen came in containers, it would literally have this food label and it would be all natural and organic, sold at wholefoods and extremely overpriced.

1.    Mood enhancers and anti-depressants:  

this just confirms what we already know. That cunts (bitches who haven’t being laid for a while) are simply irritable because they lack sex. Semen contains cortisol which is responsible for quick burst of energy for survival reasons, increased immunity, lower sensitivity to pain, and increased memory functions. Semen also contains other mood enhancing substances like estrone and serotonin.

2.    Semen prevent morning sickness,

 if it is the same one that made you pregnant.  Jizz from your side dick might cause you to literally shit out the foetus from intense punitive stomach rumbling and pain.

3.    Cum helps you sleep better.

 Melatonin in cum helps you sleep better. The ejaculator sleeps after Cumming and the swallower also sleeps from the ingestion. Win, Win just as nature intended.

4.    Upon application on the face, known as facial, it helps to slow down aging and tighten the muscles.

5.    Cum is great for hair growth.

 In this case , the cum would have to be ingested and also sprayed on the hair.

The only reason why becky has good hair is because JayZ

 has been nutting on that hair.

 

 

Great Dangers of swallowing semen.

Just like anything in the world such as taking the stairs, there are risks involved. In the case of swallowing cum, there are associated risks which are all determined by the quality of cum you are eating and the penis from which it came.
Swallowing cum might put the swallower at the risk of contacting the following diseases in their throats.

1.     HPV- Human Papilloma Virus.

Since this virus is mostly unnoticed in men, but dangerous in women, it is not easily detectable in men, this is however not the case for men that sleep with men. HPV can lead to cervical cancer, genital warts or anal cancer. The body might also become wolverine and rid itself of the virus. Upon swallowing cum infected with HPV, it is immediately hosted in your throat.

2.    Chlamydia

Even though chlamydia sounds like the name of a Russian whore, it’s not as pretty as it sounds. With swallowing cum, this may become lounged in the throat.

3.    Gonorrhea

This is another curable disease that the swallower might be at risk of contracting. Others include syphilis and herpes.

  Getting tested for STI (sexual transmitted infection) might be necessary before fellatio and cum swallowing.

Swallowing cum as a cultural Ritual.

Since semen is seen as a sign of masculinity and strength, it is often passed on the younger generation by the older men in the tribes of Papua New Guinea. Papua New Guinea is a small country on the way to Australia that seems to have been skipped by civilization. Papua New Guinea is actually a mixture of both the modern selfie-taking man and the primitive cave jungle man. The primitive jungle men in their quest to get wisdom from their frail elders, give blow jobs to the old men and swallow the thick jungle cum to obtain authority and powers. It is however not clear if the younger men are actually sons of the older men.

These men are about to have their penises sucked by teenage boys.

So to the original question, to swallow or not to swallow.? I would only repeat myself once, “fuckin just go fucking swallow the fucking jizz”

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HOW TO APPLY BLEACHING CREAM ON YOUR BODY

HOW TO APPLY A BLEACHING CREAM.

 

Before applying any bleaching cream, it is important to check for illegal ingredients on the cream before application to avoid dryness and burns. 

1.  Wash the skin with a good exfoliating soap, rinse thoroughly with water.
2.   Take a swipe of the cream with a finger. 
3. While skin is still damp, apply this in form of dots on the darkest areas of your body, These areas are usually, the knees, elbows, armpits, ankles, toes, knuckles and neck. 
4. Rub into the skin in a circular motion. 
5. Do this morning and evening  for a period of two weeks 
6. If desired result is obtained, then sparingly apply cream on the whole body while still paying more attention to the dark areas. 
7.  Discontinue use if there is any irritation, increased sensitivity or burns and be kind enough to write the reviews to spare somebody else the headache. This is one of the major advantages of buying stuff online .
 

Please note that good skin whitening or bleaching cream are not fast acting like fabric bleach. The extremely fast acting ones are cancerous and damaging to the body.

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HOW TO BLEACH YOUR SKIN WITHOUT ANY HEALTH HASSLES

How to bleach skin without any Health Hassles

Skin whitening or skin bleaching as it is often known is commonest among Asians, Africans and of course African Americans. White and toned skin is often believed to be better looking and more attractive than dark or black skin. This line of thought is completely erroneous but it keeps gaining momentum with each passing day. India is the worst hit, just look at Bollywood for instance, you can never tell that there are actually lots of black Indians in India from Bollywood, because only the light skinned Indians are paraded in films and movies, there was even a movie about this discrimination but that only strengthened it.

You would never see this beauties in Bollywood.

Skin whitening and bleaching is a multi million dollar industry in Asia and indeed in the world and most people not exactly satisfied with the color or the look of their skin buy skin whitening and bleaching creams over the counter and are often faced with the hazardous effects associated with skin bleaching and whitening with the wrong products.

A lot of times though, most people are just looking to get an even skin tone or color because in reality, even skin tones otherwise known as  the consistency of skin color is considered more attractive than having a certain skin color . This is usually the most common reason for skin whitening and bleaching and most want to bleach their skin evenly to achieve this.

African American Celebrities spend thousands of dollars monthly to get their skin bleached appropriately and they don’t seem to suffer the adverse effects that most skin bleachers suffer.  Adverse effects like hyper pigmentation which often results as bleached or whitened skin begins to age, redness of skin, skin irritation and skin cancer are a few of the many side effects of skin whitening or bleaching.

At least Nicki Minaj never complained of anything.

Skin whitening and bleaching however can be done slowly and surely just like celebrities do it without any harmful effect.
Here is how to bleach your skin  without any health hassles.

1.    Consult a Dermatologist:

Okay ,chances are you are on a budget and can’t consult one, but honestly the best way to whiten your skin is to first consult a dermatologist who would check your skin before recommending appropriate skin lightening and bleaching treatment. They would be able to test your skin to see if your skin can withstand the action of skin whitening creams. All celebrity skin whitening except for the cheap ones begin this way.

2.    Eat the right foods.

Eventually you would look like this

The best way to bleach your skin effectively is to do it both from the outside and the inside, paying much more attention to the insides than the outsides. A well bleached skin has to be bleached first from the insides that is the roots of the skin, than just applying harsh chemicals on the skin surface. There are a host of foods that help to bleach skin naturally. Some of these foods include antioxidants such as glutathione that prevents melanin production. Melanin is responsible for pigmentation of the skin, hair and eye color. With increased stress, hormones, medications and sun damage, melanin production might greatly increase leading to dark splotches and spots. Skin whitening pills falls under this category, they are supposed to help reduce melanin production, the same thing lacking in albinos. 

3.    Buy the right skin whitening creams.

In doing this, you have to be very vigilant about the ingredients of the skin whitening cream in question. Remember it is not about the immediate effects but about a lasting hassle free bleached skin. The words hydroquinone on a skin whitening cream should be a deal breaker for purchasing the cream. No matter the quantity or the doctor or celebrity endorsing the bleaching cream. These ingredient lightens skin fast but increase sensitivity and irritation which would lead to burns from sun rays, dark spots, varicose veins and age spots. It is also one of the leading causes of skin cancer. There are now several variations of these ingredient and care must be taken not to miss them on products.  

When using a lightening or brightening cream, you have to take utmost caution and use from the best whitening creams available. Apply first to the darkest parts of your body, the knees, armpits, elbows and butt only. Do not apply evenly on your skin except your skin has an even tone already. Most creams bleach evenly, so the fairest spots still appears fairer than the rest spot and upon continuous application might lead to over bleaching of the skin which might result in skin damage.

                           RELATED: WHITEN YOUR TEETH 
 

4.    Start an all-round full skincare and treatment.

An all-round skincare treatment and maintenance is needed if you are to commence skin bleaching or whitening. Even without bleaching and whitening, you are supposed to take care of your skin but when you intend to bleach your skin, you have to up your skincare. The following should become part of your beauty regimen.

a.    Sunscreen Protection: this is to prevent sun poisoning from ultraviolet rays. Remember bleached skin has less melanin and should not be directly exposed to the sun for long.

b.    Toning and exfoliation: this is to constantly remove dead cells from the surface of the skin. As we age, the ability to effectively shed dead cells reduces and  here is where exfoilants come in

c.    Moisturisation : Bleached skin has to be constantly moisturized to ensure that it does not  chap , dry and appear flaky.

d.    Use natural bathing soaps for your skin, Use goat milk soap, African black soap and a host of natural products.

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HOW TO HAVE SEX----FIRST TIME SEX SERIES

Sex is a beautiful thing. It’s a good form of exercise, a source of pleasure but the world we live in has completely messed it up. The religious bodies think of it as too sacred to be done casually outside the confines of marriage, the secular world seems to employ it as a tool for advertising, hence the word sex sells. Presently,there are several multi billion dollar industries riding on the back of sex. Sex is now like  a little piece of cloth being pulled from different sides of it’s helm by different opposing forces, thereby ruining the seams of the material. The first time sex series however hopes to teach people how to have sex and enjoy it without all the issues that come with it.

If you are reading this, I’m assuming you are preparing to have sex either for the first time or the umpteenth time and you just want to have some kind of checklist. So before you go plowing away, here is the first text on how to have sex,. The preparation. There are certain things you have to put in place when you want to have sex.

1.    Find a willing Partner

You would be surprised at the number of people who want to have sex but don’t think of the first major thing to do before having sex. Finding a willing partner, note the word willing, It takes at least two to tangle, feeling yourself is not sex, that’s just masturbation. Someone you are attracted to , who is also attracted to you and is willing to have sex with you. It’s not that hard to find. If you can’t find any, then you might want to sign up for membership on the numerous hook up sites and apps available. The only catch here is that for all apps , you should be above 18. Don’t bother lying, because you might be putting your hookup partner in danger of getting arrested for having sex with a minor. Never force someone to have sex with you, it’s called Rape .

2.    Know the age of consent.

Don’t mean to rain on your parade but you should be sure yourself and your partner are within the ages of consent for sex in your region. It is very important that either both of you or all of you are above the age limit or all of you are below it. It is very dangerous for one of you to be below the age of consent because the older person might be arrested if word ever gets out. There are lots of black males in American Prisons because they hooked up with Minors. Once you are 18 in the US for example, you cannot have sex with anyone below 18.  If both of you or all of you are in your lower teens, then you can shag away.

3.    Find a suitable Location.

You can do it anywhere

Before reading an article on “how to have sex’, you must have or be in the process of finding a good location to have sex. Okay, I don’t mean to make it sound like  finding a movie set. It’s just a place where both or all of you can be naked together without looking over your shoulders, or getting arrested for indecent exposure. Your bedroom, your partner's bedroom, the basement, or even the tree house. Somewhere you can have a couple minutes together without the fear of getting caught. Although in some cases, that may even add to the thrill. You might even book a room but again that would not be possible for minors.

4.    Buy some stuff.

The most essential thing to buy is a Condom and not just any, buy the good stuff that wouldn’t break and wouldn't impede pleasure. If you are too shy to go, get a condom at the pharmacy ,then buy online and insist on discreet packaging. The following things really suck in no particular order, 

• unwanted pregnancy, 
• teen pregnancy, 
• teen parents, 
• sexually transmitted disease,
• child support,
• abortion, 
• jail and all these things can happen if you are having sex without a condom.

You might also need to buy lube, to ease penetration, depending on what kind of sex, you are intending to practice.
Intimate wash might come in handy, due to sex horror stories of pungent smells oozing out during sex from partner’s body. Male genital odor wash for males and of a female intimate wash for females.
For females using any kind of wash or gel should be at least 3 days away from the actual D-day.

5.    Keep yourself Clean.

Boost your confidence by keeping yourself very clean before  having sex. You might want to trim pubes and armpit hair, use a mouth freshener, take a decent bath and avoid spicy foods. Funky smells during sex is a complete turn off.

6.    Exercise.

Sex requires some form of muscle exertion. It would be nice, if you have a little strength to go with it. For sex, a lot of it , lies in the lower body, the glutes, the thighs, the knees and calves. Doing a simple thing as taking a walk might be be beneficial for you.

7.    Forget everything you saw in porn.

If you are really reading an article on how to have sex and you haven’t seen porn, then don’t. Porn is not sex , it’s is simply a performance and should not be used as a measure for sex.

RELATED: SPERM SWALLOWING TO SWALLOW OR NOT

NEXT: HOW TO HAVE SEX- FOREPLAY.

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THE BEST PROTEIN SHAKES

Protein shakes are a necessity for anyone interested in  Muscle building or simply just exercising. This is mainly because protein is the building block of muscles and global diets are often lacking in the amount of protein needed to keep the body in fat burning mode as against fat storing mode. For fat burning, the percentage of protein has to be the highest in your meal whereas for muscle building, you might want to maintain a balance between your carbs and protein. Your carbs would provide energy for the weight and strength training, while the protein taken before and after workout would help with the muscle building.

Before workouts, protein shake would help to burn up your energy reserves and after workouts, the protein shake would help repair and build the muscle. While setting up your home gym, you should also  set aside some money for protein shakes.

The amount of protein daily requirement for men and women is between 0.5 to 0.8 grams to each pound of body weight.

Protein calculator

 Meaning, say you are 77kg in weight or about 180 pounds, you would be required to take 90 to 144 grams of protein daily. For a regular guy with little or moderate exercise routine, 0.5grams to one pound would be okay, while an intense body weight lifter might want to take up 0.8 grams.

Contrary to popular opinion, 1 gram to one pound of body weight is too much for the body and the body would simply convert the excess protein to fat. A lot of times, you would come across these body builders in the gym with the bouncer kind of look, which makes it impossible to tell if the guy is really pumping iron or just licking butter. A lot of times, these guys workout a lot and then go the route that Mark Wahlberg and Anthony Mackie went in preparing for their roles in Pain and Gain 

The Rock is the only one with actual muscle right here

. They take too much protein and they became bulky as against having proper muscle definition and being ripped. Of course, genetics also has a major role to play in how your muscles are formed and shaped , but back to protein shakes.

To effectively measure the amount of protein you consume per day and ensuring that you don’t overdo it, it is important to have a little food weighing scale. Rounding up grams and pounds in your head while you eat is synonymous to filing your taxes in your head.

Now we know why flo rida looks like this.

The RDA for men and women of 77kg is about 61 grams, so with your workout you are taking a little above the recommended amount. Remember this should make up  at least 35% of your calorie intake with carbs and others taking the rest

Why take protein shakes?

Simple.  Most of our foods, the world over, don’t serve enough proteins. At times, when they do,  it comes from animal sources which in most cases comes with its own share of problems. With animal protein such as beef, you now have to start worrying about the state of the cows killed , if they were organic or not, if they were killed because they got sick or if you are a PETA member , why they were killed at all. With animal proteins, especially red meat you have a higher risk of heart disease or cardiovascular disease, kidney stones and even cancer. Protein shakes then come into the mix.

The best protein shakes are the plant based protein shakes, although most of them are usually left in the back burner for whey and casein protein shakes.

What is the difference between whey and casein and which is better?

Whey and Casein are simply biological brothers, with one taking all the shine. WHEY!. Whey digests quicker and comes in handy immediately after workouts as it can be quickly absorbed by the body and has a biological value of 104, casein digests slowly and is not efficiently used by the body , the fact that it stays in the body longer might also be good for curbing appetite. However both whey and casein promote muscle growth with no remarkable difference between them. Protein shakes that combine whey and casein is preferred. In milk , for instance, 80 % of the protein in it is whey (the liquid portion) while the rest is casein (the curd).

The Best Protein Shakes.

11.  True Vitality Plant Protein Shake: 

      This is not by popular opinion, but this plant protein shake is good. It’s comparatively cheap and actually contains protein extracted from plants with digestive enzymes in tow. Okay no BS! It tastes like sawdust and doesn’t mix well without a blender bottle. For me the chocolate flavor is worse, but this protein shake is by far the healthiest and clean especially if you have issues digesting protein.

1b. Amazing Grass Green SuperFood: 

Okay, this is actually not a protein shake , it’s a blend of fruits and a lot of herbs but it goes well with smoothies, revitalizes, alkalizes , detoxes and helps with good skin. 

2  2.  Optimium Nutrition 100% Whey Gold Standard: 

     This whey protein isn’t as cheap as the others, but is the most recommended by trainers and gym instructors. I personally don’t get the hype though, but it is said to be the best quality of whey protein. It doesn’t taste bad either and mixes instantly. It is however recommended to be taken three times a day. First thing in the morning, pre-workouts and post workouts. There is a truckload of flavors and sizes and every gym junkie would claim to have taken it at one time or the other.

3.   3.   BSN SYNTHA Protein Powder.

If you have a sweet tooth and taste plays a major determinant for putting anything in your buccal cavity, then this protein shake is for you. The peanut butter is one of the sweetest. What you have to know though, is peanut butter is 25% protein and 50% fat, so in addition to your protein a lot of fat is added just to make it taste good for you. It comes in about 9 flavors and several variants and can also be pricey.

4.       4. MUSCLE TECH NITROTECH

Nitrotech is a protein shake that is as good as it sounds, not very soluble but well prepared and remarkable good for muscle growth. Within weeks of taking this, mixed with appropriate diet and exercise, you would see remarkable muscle definition, which is exactly what you wanted in the first place.

5.      .5. MUSCLE PHARM COMBAT POWDER

 

Great tasting protein shake, takes like cookies and cream, it goes a long way in curbing appetite and it is also very easy to blend, with glutamine added to aid muscle recovery. It is one protein shake that give optimum nutrition a run for it’s money. It however seems to live a little after taste.

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