SPERM SWALLOWING: TO SWALLOW OR NOT TO SWALLOWSperm in this particular context is actually supposed to be semen, the male ejaculate and is rightfully defined by Mike Cunt as the ” white squiggly liquid which causes your life to be ruined when reaches womans egg” (sic). This is the most voted definition written in April 2003 on urban dictionary, making Mike cunt some kind of legend.
Semen has so many names, cum, nut, jizz, penis pudding, seed, spunk, splooge and baby maker, to name just a few. In recent times, women and gay men have constantly debated whether to cum swallow or not.
Knowing fully well that this article is not about to change your mind on what you have already determined to do or not to do, it is important at this junction, to use the words of Jesus, "What you are about to do, do quickly.” Or in more literal terms, “fuckin just go fucking swallow the fucking jizz”.
Cum swallowing was made popular by porn, it was not done by the ancient Egyptians while they were building the pyramids, as those motherfuckers clearly needed all the energy they could get. There is no record of swallowing semen by the ancient Greeks, although it is greatly suspected and suggested, maybe I’m just too fucking dumb to do proper research. Ten years ago , this article would even have been completely strange and perverse but time always makes things more perverse.
The question here is to swallow or not to swallow.
Swallowing cum can be for three reasons.
1. As a fetish
2. As a health benefit. In this case, we would have to consider the pros and the cons of swallowing that jizz.
3. As a cultural Ritual.
Swallowing Cum as a Fetish
If you or your partner has a fetish of swallowing cum or watching the other swallow cum, then why read an article about it. Just swallow it already. No one is going to discourage you from your fetish, you pervert. You only live once and what is life without some kind of fetish. No matter how bad you feel about yourself for swallowing cum, just remember swallowing cum can never put you on TLC’s my strange addiction . To be on that program, you have to do much more crazy stuff like hair eating, tissue paper eating or be a full on cannibal.
The only plus side to that, is that you might be making some money pretending to eat human hair or smell people’s butts. If swallowing cum is really your fetish, then get your partner a semen booster that would increase volume of the cum right up to over 300% of what he normally shoots.
Swallowing cum for it’s health benefits.
To swallow cum for it’s health benefits, we have to way the pros and the cons .
Health benefits of swallowing semen
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Semen is a nutritious cocktail. It contains fructose, ascorbic acid, protein, calcium, chlorine, DNA, magnesium, Vitamin B12, Lactic Acid, Nitrogen, Vitamin C, citric acid, Blood group antiegnes and s, zinc and cholesterol.
If semen came in containers, it would literally have this food label and it would be all natural and organic, sold at wholefoods and extremely overpriced.
1. Mood enhancers and anti-depressants:
this just confirms what we already know. That cunts (bitches who haven’t being laid for a while) are simply irritable because they lack sex. Semen contains cortisol which is responsible for quick burst of energy for survival reasons, increased immunity, lower sensitivity to pain, and increased memory functions. Semen also contains other mood enhancing substances like estrone and serotonin.
2. Semen prevent morning sickness,
if it is the same one that made you pregnant. Jizz from your side dick might cause you to literally shit out the foetus from intense punitive stomach rumbling and pain.
3. Cum helps you sleep better.
Melatonin in cum helps you sleep better. The ejaculator sleeps after Cumming and the swallower also sleeps from the ingestion. Win, Win just as nature intended.
4. Upon application on the face, known as facial, it helps to slow down aging and tighten the muscles.
5. Cum is great for hair growth.
In this case , the cum would have to be ingested and also sprayed on the hair.
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| The only reason why becky has good hair is because JayZ | has been nutting on that hair. |
Great Dangers of swallowing semen.
Just like anything in the world such as taking the stairs, there are risks involved. In the case of swallowing cum, there are associated risks which are all determined by the quality of cum you are eating and the penis from which it came.
Swallowing cum might put the swallower at the risk of contacting the following diseases in their throats.
Swallowing cum might put the swallower at the risk of contacting the following diseases in their throats.
1. HPV- Human Papilloma Virus.
Since this virus is mostly unnoticed in men, but dangerous in women, it is not easily detectable in men, this is however not the case for men that sleep with men. HPV can lead to cervical cancer, genital warts or anal cancer. The body might also become wolverine and rid itself of the virus. Upon swallowing cum infected with HPV, it is immediately hosted in your throat.2. Chlamydia
Even though chlamydia sounds like the name of a Russian whore, it’s not as pretty as it sounds. With swallowing cum, this may become lounged in the throat.
3. Gonorrhea
This is another curable disease that the swallower might be at risk of contracting. Others include syphilis and herpes.
Getting tested for STI (sexual transmitted infection) might be necessary before fellatio and cum swallowing.
Swallowing cum as a cultural Ritual.
Since semen is seen as a sign of masculinity and strength, it is often passed on the younger generation by the older men in the tribes of Papua New Guinea. Papua New Guinea is a small country on the way to Australia that seems to have been skipped by civilization. Papua New Guinea is actually a mixture of both the modern selfie-taking man and the primitive cave jungle man. The primitive jungle men in their quest to get wisdom from their frail elders, give blow jobs to the old men and swallow the thick jungle cum to obtain authority and powers. It is however not clear if the younger men are actually sons of the older men.
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| These men are about to have their penises sucked by teenage boys. |
So to the original question, to swallow or not to swallow.? I would only repeat myself once, “fuckin just go fucking swallow the fucking jizz”
